To lighten my mood and make me feel better, the following three stories are my top three most embarrassing moments of my life. They may not seem that embarrassing to you when you are reading them but rest assured that they were VERY VERY traumatic at the time!
Number Three most embarrassing moment:
My sister, Wendy was about 8 months pregnant with my niece Morgan, who will be 16 in June. So, about 16 years ago, my mom and sister and I were in Kmart when it was on Stateline Road (where Burlington is now) and we had been seeking out the specials.....cause that's how we roll.....and as we were leaving me and Wendy began picking on each other. Keep in mind that I was round about 16 and she was round about 19 almost 20 and also keep in mind that she was 8 months pregnant. As we are walking through the parking lot I am in front of her and she decides to kick my foot behind my leg and trip me. I fall to the ground and roll. And I didn't stop rolling until I was under the car that was parked next to ours! The really really really uncool part of the whole thing was: A.) there was someone in that car. B.) there was someone in the car behind that one. C.) there were people all over the parking lot. D.) I looked like an idiot rolling all over the ground. E.) I got my clothes dirty and the main one F.) I couldn't not kick the living C. R. A. P. (and you have to spell that word cause it doesn't sound as bad when you do) out of my sister cause she was flippin 8 month pregnant! Definitely embarassing at the age of 16......you can call me grace.....
Number Two:
About 8 years ago or so, John and I were walking through Kroger doing some grocery shopping. We didn't have any kids yet so we always went grocery shopping together as a little date, per say. Anyway, we were walking down the cereal aisle and John was pushing the basket. We both stopped and were focusing more on what looked good to us than on what was going on around us. There weren't many people in Kroger at the time so we just kinda meandered mindlessly back and forth. We kinda spoke to each other off and on but nothing really major. I decided on which cereal I wanted and was holding the box making my way back to the basket. Still eyeing the cereals, so as to make sure that I was getting the one that I wanted most, I walked over to John and patted his bottom and said, "Did you find the one you want baby?" I looked up and there was a complete stranger staring at me! He grinned a sheepish, somewhat embarrassed but somehow pleased smile and said, "Yeah, honey, I think I did!" I don't think I ever told anyone about that because I was so embarrassed! I look back on it today and think it's hilarious and realize that if that same scenario happened today, I would take it in stride, probably adding a taste of sarcasm somewhere in there cause, once agian, that's just how I roll!
And brace yourselves! Here is the number one most embarrassing moment in Jeanine Nichole Hallberg Burnside's life! So far.........
I had lost over 70 lbs during the summer between 8th and 9th grade. I was finally able to wear lots of different style clothes that I had never been able to wear before. My birthday is April 18th and I had just gotten a babydoll dress back when they were popular. Those of you that knew me back then surely remembers this outfit cause I was so proud of it...It was my fave! It was black with short sleeves and big huge yellow sunflowers with green leaves all over it. I had gotten matching tights that were also black with about half dollar size sunflower designs on them. I also had gotten a pair of black babydoll shoes and some quarter size real looking sunflower earrings and matching ponytail holders with big quarter size sunflowers hot glued on them (I wore my hair in little baby pony tails using these). So our youth group was going to a concert at the coliseum and I decided to wear my new outfit. I wanted to look cute for the boys, of course. As we walk to our seat at the coliseum we were very close to the top and if you remember correctly, it had no rails to hold onto and the stairs went STRAIGHT up. Also, remembering I had a dress on, you realize by now that was already a recipe for disaster. On the way up the stairs I trip forward and give a full moon to the people that were following me up the stairs and to 90% of the coliseum too.....do you guys remember how immature middle school and early high school boys can be? Heck, all boys are immature. They teased me a little but I got over that and had a great time and as we were walking to the bus after the concert, we were acting silly, like 9th graders do. We all were doing the Monkee Walk......you know, you drape your arm around the other persons shoulder and then you all put your right foot forward, then bring around your left foot.....go YouTube The Monkee Walk and watch one of the videos...you'll understand. As we began the walk, I somehow got tripped up and stumbled forward but this time I actually fell down and once again, mooned half of Memphis on the way down. Yeah, that's funny....but just wait.
On the way back to church, we stopped at the McDonald's on Stateline for dinner cause it was really the only thing open at that time of night. I keep saying the phrase....once again...but it's the only thing that accurately depicts what's going on. SO.......Once again, being a 9th grade girl and all, we all decided, after we ate, that we would go out on the playground and pile into the ball pit while we were waiting on everyone. BAD BAD DECISION. Definitely the wrong thing to do in a dress! Especially considering how my night had already gone however, I am not the brightest crayon in the box sometimes....not the sharpest tool in the shed either! I climb in the balls and after a few minutes, Summer say, "Jeanine, is your dress ripped?" I looked down and the seam between my chest and the skirt part of the dress was ripped about 6 or 8 inches across and my goods were on display. I pulled it together and began trying to get out without flashing the rest of my junk for others to see when I realized that one of my new sunflower earrings was missing and was most likely gone forever in the ball pit. I had "my girls" look for that while I went inside to our youth director, Bro. Steve, who was one of two adults on this outing and neither was a woman who would have a sewing kit. I asked everyone I knew and also random strangers if they had any safety pins or just push pins.....anything but no one had anything but a stapler......Needless to say, my dress was stapled together and it stayed really well until my parent came and got me. Oh yeah, and my girls found my earring too! That was my most embarrassing night ever! I don't think I will ever top that night. At least I HOPE NOT!
Runner Up:
***On the way to NOLA to visit Andy and Kelly when we first got married, I was driving and I was speeding. I had never been pulled over before and had no idea where to pull over on the interstate or really anywhere. The cop pulled behind me and turned on his lights and I started trying to pull over on the left side of the interstate instead of the right side like a normal person. The cop looked at me like I had three heads when he came to the car and asked me if I really thought I should pull over on the three inch median as opposed to the one the size of three lanes on the other side. I plead ignorance and he let me go but that was still enough to make me feel stupid and embarrassed at the time.
Runner Runner Up:
***This one just happened the other night. I was walking into the movie theater on a date with my awesome hubby and I wasn't watching where I was going and I stepped on a piece of uneven pavement and I fell down. I did a gainer into the pavement. John said I fell so fast that he didn't even process that I was falling until I was already down. Thankfully I caught myself with my hands mostly and a little wiht my knee. I was so embarrassed that I was up almost instantly! It did kinda help that there werent but a handful of people around.
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